Fear of Flying

I took a fun and informative "Fear of Flying" workshop yesterday. As a fearful flyer, I've wanted to take a class like this for a while, and it was awesome to see it offered at the San Francisco Airport!

I've had a fear of flying since my teens. It was very intense until my early 20s - I would dread flights for days ahead (preparing to die), be gripped with fear throughout each flight, and drive instead of flying if it was at all possible. When I was in college, I opted to take a 20-hour bus to train to bus Amtrak sequence to Los Angeles instead of a 1-hour flight.

In my mid-20s, I had a job that required me to travel at least once or twice a month. The constant exposure helped, and most flights were under two hours. While I don't think shorter flights are much less "dangerous" (in quotes because flights really aren't dangerous) than shorter ones, the shorter flights just didn't allow my anxiety to build so much.

Over time, I also learned more about the mechanics of flight, the heavy regulations imposed on the industry, and the very, very rigorous hiring, training, certification and professional conduct requirements placed on pilots. This helped. So did getting my general anxiety under control.

However I still do get nervous on takeoff, during turbulence, and sometimes during landing. On our recent trip to Israel, I had a breakdown during a bad turbulence episode - after the pilot told the flight attendants to sit down, I just lost it, almost waking up my sleeping toddler. On a following flight from Las Vegas, I almost grabbed on to a passenger next to me during a somewhat bumpy takeoff. So...not great.

The course was offered by a nonprofit called Fear of Flying Clinic. They offer one-day workshops and four-day in-depth clinics that include a "graduation flight" to Seattle and back. I took just the workshop, though the full clinic would probably be really a really fun and enriching experience, even for those who aren't afraid of flying.

About 20 people attended. Most of them shared my fears, many had more intense ones. A few said that they avoid flying, choose to drive or even cancel trips and events, and/or fly only while heavily medicated. Sounds familiar!

The course was led by a team of a volunteer moderator (a former graduate of the course), a clinical psychologist and practicing therapist, and a super experienced pilot.

The agenda kicked off with an introduction to some Cognitive Behavioral Therapy concepts and techniques (e.g. exploring the relationship between the environment, thoughts, feelings, physical responses and behaviors). While I was familiar with the content from all my general therapy experience, it was.

The pilot's presentation was long and awesome! It featured an overview of pilot hiring and training requirements, an overview of the plane components (wings, engines, etc.) and how they work in flight mechanics, and a discussion of the major anxiety-inducing components of the flight: takeoff, landing and everybody's favorite, turbulence. I was pleasantly surprised by the length and thoroughness of the presentation! I thought that the pilot's presentation would be an hour max, but he reviewed a lot of information and answered TON of questions from the class attendees. It was cool that most of the questions asked were usually ones I also had, even if I had forgotten.

We wrapped up by further review of CBT techniques, including identifying cognitive distortions and lead to irrational thoughts and beliefs. We also discussed the importance of experiencing anxiety rather than avoiding it. I think this was one of the most powerful parts of the class. The therapist reiterated that all anxiety ends, and the more you allow yourself to get to the peak and then let it end naturally, the easier it will be to manage. I think the beauty of this guidance is that it applies to all anxiety-provoking situations, not just to flying.

Am I cured of my fear? Hell no! But hoping that I can get to a point when I feel the same about flying as I do about walking down the street.